Going Grey is Scary

and I know it shouldn't be.  But, there it is.  We live in a world where eighteen is seen as the height of physical perfection.  I found my first few grey hairs at sixteen.  Dying it then was fun, especially during my art school years, White? sure.  Red? sure. Orange? absolutely.  Two-tone? why not.
Fast forward 20 years.
Now, living in a city where everything takes too much time and money, dying my hair every four weeks is tedious and expensive.  I was going to a terrific salon to ease my transition into grey.  The last eight months left me with gorgeous chestnut hair and clever lowlights and hightlights, but the treatments were $200 a pop every four weeks.  The resulting growth being a noticeable cool salt'n'pepper contrasting starkly with all the warm tones going on the rest of the way.  I knew this couldn't go on.

Back in 2006:

We had just moved back from Victoria and I was in the process of growing out my hair for the wedding.  I was dying it regularly every four weeks as the new growth was no longer just a 'strand or two'.

2009 - still dying it regularly and unable to give up the longer cut.

Here in Ottawa I began a journey of lightening and highlights in an attempt to let the grey grow in.  Unfortunately, the resulting effect - however lovely - never allowed the new growth to seamlessly integrate with the old.  $800 later, I decided to go on a dye diet.  No more!  I am too chicken to cut it so short that all the dyed hair would be gone, but I came pretty close.  I figure in October, I can have the rest of the dyed hair cut away and start allowing the 'real' hair to emerge.

a close-up of my roots!

I thought letting go of that image of myself as raven-haired would be easy to let go of after seeing pictures of so many fantastic women who have let their grey grow in.  An example here:  I think this is Eileen Fisher, but I may be wrong.  The interwebs are unreliable sometimes.

but man, I am so afraid of seeming 'old'.  And let's face it - at 20 years younger -  as cool as this woman seems, am I ready to look her age?????  The picture of myself with Chase in 2009 is still how I see myself.  If I get offered a seniors discount in the next year, that's it.  The hair salon is where I'll gladly drop my $200.